Winter:)

In the winter the snow gets so thick that you can't walk anywhere! Once it hits you are stuck inside until
the cold front moves away. Kelsey was home alone on a cold Friday night with only Jersey Shore marathons to keep her company. A few days before a driver crashed into a telephone pole, knocking over the only possible way she had to communicate with her beloved Anthony. They were lovers from the start, a match made in heaven persay. Finally Kelsey got up the courage to start the treacherous walk through the snow to Anthony's. She packed on 12 layers and strapped on her fashionable snow shoes and started
towards the door surprised to find Anthony half frozen. He already made the walk to see her. She threw
her arms around him and guided him through the door. They shared hot coco and lived happily ever after:)

An Open Letter to the Guy That Laughs at the Gym

Dear guy 3 machines down,

                You make my workout so much more enjoyable. I have ran 3 miles with sweat dripping down my face, my breath is shorter with every thud my foot makes against the machine. I was dreading the last half a mile when I hear your laugh booming off the walls. We are watching the same show and yes I did just let out a chuckle because Allan said something funny to Jake but really? It has to be your first time watching Two and a Half Men or something because that wasn’t even one of the funnier jokes. Oh! There it is again; apparently you thought that was funnier because you were WAY louder. Now I could care less about the characters on the TV show, they aren’t the ones making me laugh anymore but I am tripping over my own feet on the treadmill because of you. Do you not know how loud you are? Or that people are staring?  Or do you not care? Well either way you made my workout and most definitely my day. So thank you cute guy with a loud laugh, I hope to see you here soon. ;)

<3 The girl 3 machines down

Photograph

        My dad was lying on the couch with my little brother attached at the hip. My brother’s head perched on my dads shoulder with both bright faces pointed towards the camera. You can tell that both smiles are genuine and they had been laughing only seconds before the photograph was snapped.

            A close nit family with bonds that could never be broken. My dad, brother, and I had been the 3 Musketeers ever since my brother was brought home from the hospital. Our dad was our superhero. He was so strong and he could deal with anything; until we found his kryptonite. May2005 was when my dad broke in two. He became distant and started to shy away from my brother and I. He was starting to tear the bonds that were supposed to be invincible. The divorce took a harsh toll on everyone except my mom who was the one that initiated the split. She moved out and started renting a house causing my brother and I to go back and forth between the 2 houses; something my dad never wanted for us.

           

            My mom started dating shortly after which was like a slap in the face to my dad. Seeing my dad like that because of my mom made me build resentment towards her and whomever she brought home for my brother and I to meet. Shortly after reuniting with a guy she dated in high school they made it official as husband and wife and not long after that my baby sister was born. During this timeline my dad was a mess and in the process our lives were a mess as well.

            Still to this day there is only one time that my dad has ever cried in front of my brother and I. That was when he was saying sorry for everything that had happened in the last few months and how it was all his fault. Seeing him cry made me cry and then shortly after I started my brother fallowed. The point that was sad wasn’t the fact that he was crying but the fact that he was taking all the blame for my mother’s actions. He was saying sorry to us to try and make up for the apology that we would never hear escape her lips.

            Seeing those genuine smiles and pure happiness in that picture it makes me think about how our lives would be different if he hadn’t been strong. If he could go back in time and stay there in that happy moment forever, would he? Or would our superman still suffer through the kryptonite to keep the 3 of us together? The lonely nights, and a dark empty house. Was it worth the crying, and depression to see us all come out the other end victorious? Would he stay in that picture forever with genuine joy plastered across his face and us being little by his side or would he go through hell just to see my brother and I grow up?

            Those where the dark days or our family but even though we all went through the same thing, it was different because we did it together. To this day it still amazes me how close the 3 of us are and how strong my dad really is. Those green eyes and that 1000-watt smile, top off the perfect person that will always be my hero. 

Memories.

I opened my eyes to the leaves beginning to change to the colors of fire and blanket the ground like snow on the Sierra Nevadas. I begin to reminisce about my favorite memories. Waking up early at my grandmas house to smell the cold and crisp morning air filling my lungs, while I look out the window to see the earth gently arising from its sleep. I remember opening up all of the windows in my grandmas house during cold winter nights only to comforted by the warmth of my blanket and the crackling of the fire.  I cherished the nights that I got to go to my aunts house for a sleepover because I knew she would make her famous mexican hot chocolate. It was so rich and thick; something you could never get out of a package. I longed for the feeling of sand between my toes and the waves crashing against my body as I stood there sinking a little more as the tide went out. I looked out and saw dolphins swimming by the surfers and playing in the water. Its was magical to see that in their natural habitat. Life has been an adventure with amazing moments and moments that have made me stronger. The quote that I live by is “Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.” and I plan on doing just that.

A Letter Lost In Time.

Dearest Little Lexi,

                          Don’t ever look back; always look in front of you. Times are going to get tough but you can handle it. You are so much stronger than you give yourself credit for. Don’t let other people create your moods because you create your own happiness. You will have your first heartbreak but you will end up being friends again in the future, just give him time. Don’t rush into anything and take lots of pictures. I know that you are dying to grow up but just stop and take a step back every once in a while and just enjoy it. Turn every bad memory into a good one. Play a lot of sports and try everything at least once. Keep good friends in your life and toss away the bad friends because no good can come from them. Never talk to a best friend’s ex, even if they say its okay because nothing is worth risking a friendship. Boys come and go but a true friendship is forever. No matter how irritating dad gets, you are his first kid, just take a step back and remember that he loves you. Don’t let fear stop you from taking risks and living the way you have always wanted. Don’t be afraid to stand out in a crowd. I know that you love to be the center of attention but sometimes let other people have the spotlight. Embrace your differences and don’t read too much into things. When you and dad get into an argument in the morning never get out of the truck without saying I love you. Remember you can’t change your family no matter how badly you want to so embrace the one that you have and love them unconditionally. You can do anything you want in this world so shoot for the stars and never let anyone tell you that you cant do it. Prove people wrong when they don’t think you can or when they don’t believe you because it’s great to know that you surpassed their expectations. Always try in school even though you don’t think that it matters right now. You can take this advice or leave it; Its up to you. Just know that even if you don’t your life will still turn out okay. You will have amazing friends and even though you will have the same family, you will all be pretty close. I hope this helps lexi.

Love,

Older Lexi:)

Eyes Wide Open

Today I went outside and I noticed that the leaves are already starting to fall. I look forward to seeing that all year. Don't get me wrong I love summer but it's just not the same. When I think of fall I think of trips with my WHOLE family to Apple Hill and to the Pumpkin Patch. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins would all make the drive and meet up. I wish that I could go back to those times. The laughter, caramel apples, and the smell of hay. It didn't smell so great at the time but I would smell that for the rest of my life if I could go back one last time. Since then my family has vastly grown apart and my grandma has passed away. I remember riding the hay ride with her and us laughing at all the pointless things. We would laugh at how little kids are fighting or how every time we would go over a bump everyone on the truck would go up or even how the exhaust from the truck smells so bad. Isn't it funny how its always the little things that make the moment memorable? My family continues to go back every year but never with the whole gang. It never compares to the times that we all went together and I'm positive it never will. When I see the leaves start to fall I think of how much I miss those times, but at least I have the memories:) 

Why I Write...

If you really know me you would know that I write no matter the mood I happen to be in. I write to relieve anger and tension, or to express deep emotions that wouldn’t be said correctly using my voice.

When I get angry my mind is flustered with emotions and thoughts that I so desperately want to say. When I get overwhelmed I go in my room with a pen and a notebook and let all my emotions spill out of me. I sometimes deliver the letters myself, sometimes they find the person unintentionally, while others just stay in a notebook propped on a shelf never to be read.

I love the idea of starting with a blank page and spilling my heart, thoughts and ideas, transforming it to be completely and utterly mine. I never have to worry about it judging me, talking back, or contradicting my thoughts. It just sits there taking the compliments and inside jokes, or the stingingly painful words like a champ. A piece of paper is the best listener I have come across and I know I could never find a better one. 

To me writing isn’t about a pen meeting a piece of paper; It’s about telling an amazing experience that can take you to another place. It’s also a way for you to let someone in and see behind one of the many doors you keep closed from the world. In the writing community I am never wrong because it is ultimately me and how I view the topic of discussion.

I write because I love going back to old letters, stories, and opinionated pieces to see how vast or little things have changed. I write because it helps me remember times in my life and also helps me forget. But most importantly I write because speaking aloud always falls short to what I can explain using a pen and a piece of paper.